Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Tuesday: Damn it

Sir Barkington.

"Steal my nuts will you!"
  • Another puppy.
  • Batgirl.
  • It's funny that a comedian can raise more money than actual legitimate candidates.  Also, it kind of shows how rich people are attempting to subvert democracy by buying an election.
  • I always liked him as captain, because he would always shout everything he said.

Monday, January 30, 2012

Monday: Draw a Dinosaur Day

Here's mine:
That's the sun being scared.
Unfortunately not much to discuss today. I've felt crappy all day, and I'm somewhat concerned that I brewed an overly spicy and potentially deadly chili yesterday. That would be sucky since it tastes so good.

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Sunday: Instead of cleaning, cooking!

Which is by far the better option.  Since my parents are visiting this week, I won't be able to make chili for the Super Puppy Bowl. Because of that, I decided to make it today instead.  Ingredient panorama!

Ok, let's start at 6 oclock and spiral around.
  • Third of a pound of bacon. My actual request at the meat counter was "whatever that pile is," but that's probably a risky suggestion.
  • Pound of ground beef
  • Pound of beef chuck roast.  They don't sell local stew meat, so this was the next best option.
  • Can of beef stock.
  • Can of tomato paste.
  • Can of chipotle peppers (although I didn't use them all).
  • Two cans of tomatoes.  I went with whole, but then needed to stick blender them a bit. I don't know what the lesson is on this one.
  • Soy sauce.
  • Worcestershire sauce.
  • Spices: paprika, cayenne, chili powder, cumin, coriander, smoked paprika, oregano, dried ancho flakes from last year that I've kept in an old cinnamon jar.
  • Super dark 88% chocolate.
  • Onion.
  • Garlic.
  • Fresno pepper, because they seem to be on every cooking show I see now a days.
  • Two jalapenos.
  • Unpictured: salt, sugar, a half cup of old wine that was hiding in my fridge.
"That seems a little bit involved for chili, don't you think?" Yes. Yes I do.  That's why I make it once a year.
Step One: Toast the cumin and ancho flakes in a pan to get the flavors going.  I guess you could toast other things if you wanted, but I didn't have anything else to toast.  I then ground this all down in my mortar and pestle, and moved on to the next stage of the sauce.
Step 2: Bring halfish of the can of beef stock to a boil and add the soy sauce and Worcestershire sauce and a scoop of the tomato paste.  Lower the heat and add all the spices (which look really cool, and I should have taken a picture, but I didn't so you'll just have to take my word that it looks really cool.  They all pile up on the surface and float there until you stir them in).  I also added the sauce from the chipotles, and about 1/2-3/4 of the peppers from the can.
Step 3: Chop up the chocolate and add that to the sauce.  I ended up with like almost two ounces here, when I was aiming for closer to one.  This made the sauce have a really strong chocolate smell throughout the cooking (it went away in the final product, but just be warned that 2oz is probably too much).

Step 4: Keep the sauce on a low simmer, then stick blender the hell out of the peppers and everything to mix. I didn't take a picture of this because stick blendering is too fun.

Step Whatever: Brown the beef in a bit of olive oil.  You can do this while the sauce is cooking, and you probably should, because I think I spent like two hours doing prep and initial cooking, so do these serially would make that even longer.  I did the ground beef first, and then sliced up the chuck roast into bite size stew bits.
Step e: Remove the beef from the pan.  I pulled the ground beef before putting in the stew meat, as that allowed the stew meat to cook without having to worry about the ground beef getting underneath it.
Step 9: When the beef is browned and removed, chop the bacon, and add it to the pan.  The goal here is to render out the fat to use to cook the vegetables more than anything else.  I got impatient (as you can see), and added the chopped garlic at this point, instead of waiting for the bacon to crisp up.  It doesn't really matter, since all the liquid that gets added later would ruin any crispiness.
Step tree: Dice up the onion, and add to the pan to cook.  Once the onions are translucent, add in the minced (or, more so, really small chop) peppers.  I minced the fresno, and one of the jalapenos, and then sliced the other jalapeno in half to add in later.  I used this strategy last year, and it seemed to work well.
Step "wow, that doesn't look appetizing": Hrm.  There's a lot that happened before this picture.  First, use the wine to deglaze the pan after the vegetables are cooked, and then add the meat back in.  Drain the tomatoes into the sauce, and add the actual tomatoes to the pan.  Stick blend the tomato juice into the sauce to thin it out a bit, and then add the sauce to the pan.  Stir everything together, and finish by adding the halved jalapeno, the rest of the stock and tomato paste, and cover.  Simmer for two-three hours, stirring periodically.  I tested it about a half hour before it was finished, and added some salt and some sugar (to cut down on the acidity and spice a bit).
Step: Plated.  I was lazy and didn't want to make cornbread, so I just threw some doritos on the plate.  Yes, I know.  Lazy.
With added cheese, because cheese makes everything better.

The main problem I had with last year's chili was that all the spice seemed to be on the back of the tongue, which felt like something was missing.  I don't know if it was the chipotles or the fresno I added this year, but this was fixed this time.  It's a bit overly spicy, clearly being on the hot side of the spectra.  However, despite the usual mechanics of spicy foods, this one washes away with just water.  I don't understand why, but it's really convenient.  You can eat as much as you want until your tongue is screaming, and then cool it all down just as fast.

This is probably tomorrow's dinner as well, and then the rest of the week will be whatever, based on my role as tour guide.  I made about eight cups, most of which went into the freezer so I'll have enough leftovers to make it through the rest of the year.

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Saturday: Instead of cooking, cleaning!

Cleaning sucks.  I hate cleaning.  DIAF, cleaning.

I did get errands done, so if I wanted to, I could cook dinner.  Maybe if it cools off a bit more, but given that I need hours of braising/cooking time, I probably should just wait until tomorrow.  It's supposed to be cooler then.

This thing was broken at WF again today.  I did get a better picture this week.

  • Since google thinks I like Tanzania, I felt like I should link to this story.  I wonder if this is the first sign that google's become sentient.  Maybe this is a suggestion, like: "I've examined your web searches and browsing habits, and I think you should look into Tanzania."  That'd be kind of cool. Also: one step closer to being destroyed by robot overlords.
  • See, this is what I'm talking about: I'm innocently browsing my RSS feeds, and this comes up.  Normally I'd just say, "puppy haet cat!" but since it's a particular kind of puppy...
  • Oh give me a break. Again?  This video is hilarious too.  If your particularly lazy, you can just click through to the gif versions of the best parts.
  • When I took biology, it was in Indiana.  The teacher I had at the time started the section on evolution by saying something to the effect of, "I don't care what you talk about at home, or what church you go to or whatever. We're going to talk about evolution here, because that's science.  You can think that god created everyone if you want, but if you don't want to fail this class, you're going to learn about Darwin."  Now imagine it being said by a particularly tall version of the old guy from "Up."
  • And here's the link that I completely forgot to put in that last story.  It did have a point.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Friday: lazy day

Yeah, I like waffles!

Ok, so they're just crappy freezer waffles, but I've been wanting waffles for days.  I paired them with crappy deli chicken fingers (with hot sauce) to get the chicken and waffles thing going, and then some fried potatoes because I wanted to do like a breakfast thing.  Then I put cheese on them.  So that kind of ruined the breakfast for dinner idea.


It was tasty, I enjoyed it, and I don't care what anyone says.  Om nom nom.

How about a puppy video?

Beyond that, I only have one link for today.  Doctor Cat really doesn't belong in the maternity ward.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Thursday: Math (contains little to no actual math)

Meatloaf sandwich again today, because I didn't want to bother waiting on a potato to cook. Potatoes are lazy like that.  Have I posted these pictures before?
Puppy haet bike!

Do you like my hat?

Oh no! Google's discovered my secret love for Tanzania!

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Wednesday: baked potatoes take longer than I like

Basically the same as Sunday's dinner, but with a baked potato instead of mashed.  I wish it didn't take an hour and a half to make them caramely and yummy.
Seriously. Not enough time exists to explain.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Tuesday: Sandwich time

Meatloaf sandwich time!
 Cut open:

Super tasty, except I need to go buy new buns again tomorrow, because Safeway fucking sucks at not selling moldy bread.  This is what, the third time I've bought bread from them that had mold when I got it home?  Fuck you, Safeway.

I missed the state of the union address, but I saw this picture:
"Now who is short? Super-Kucinich will destroy you all!"

Monday, January 23, 2012

Monday: blarg

Came home, sat down to do some math stuff, fell asleep, woke up two hours later twisted into an impossible shape, reworked geometry to untwist into a regular shape, made a ham sandwich instead of sticking to the menu plan, since I didn't want to bother cooking things.

This evening clearly defines "full of win."

Here, have a comic that will put you in the same mindset I had when I woke up from that nap.

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Sunday: Meatloaf

Today was grocery day.  The health thingy kiosk at WF was blue-screened-of-death.
My phone was blurried wiggle of speed when I took the picture, though.
 So, meatloaf:


Sliced up with asparagus, mashed potatoes, and a bit of sauce:

The menu plan for this week is pretty simple, too:

  • Monday: Meatloaf
  • Tuesday: Meatloaf
  • Wednesday: Meatloaf, but this time in sandwich form
  • Thursday: Meatloaf?
  • Friday: Not meatloaf.  Let's say neighborhood sushi place.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Might as well do the rest of them too

Vote Ron Paul. He supports crudely spray painted signs.

"I transcribe text messages onto paper. I also have no available childcare, because that's socialism."

"No, I always keep one hand in my back pocket to make sure The Gays don't get me."


"This is the piggiest face I can make!" "BEEP BOOP! TARGET ACQUIRED!"

"It's late and past my bedtime. Why am I here?"

"You know what? Fuck you South Carolina. Fuck you and your stupid primary."

"See, if I were a Sith Lord, I'd be killing you all with lightning right now. Vote Romney: I'm not a Sith Lord."
Oops.  That's going to hurt his chances with the evangelicals, I guess.

Saturday 2: Dinner

Earlier this week I was really craving food from places that don't exist in Hawaii.  One of these places was Menna's, which makes really good, really not-so-healthy food.  However, they're also super easy to duplicate at home:
This is basically the Buffalo dub, with added marinara. Chicken tender, tossed with hot sauce, topped with blue cheese, shredded cheese, and marinara.  I even fried up some potatoes:
Also a cherry coke.
To make it official, I would have had to grill them to seal.  Instead I just used toothpicks. Lazy.

Let's make fun of Republican presidential candidates:
"I always look like I'm about to cry."


I went through all my links earlier today, so I only have this one. It's SUPER EFFECTIVE! though.

Saturday: Bakery tour!

I think this is stop three on the bakery tour (correction, four):
It was also mentioned in that Honolulu magazine article, and it sounded a lot like Pastry House Hippo in Novi.  I went there a number of times when I lived in Michigan, as it was usually a convenient place to stop for a snack on the way to the DIA.

I was lazy, and didn't get there until late, but they still had some good things:
This is oriented wrong, but I didn't want to bother.
Cinnamon doughnut.
Derpy eyed panda.
Cheese croissant.  I thought it had ham, but that must have been the one next to it.
Apple bunny.  No clue about the brown bar.
I had the cheese croissant and the derpy-eyed panda for a snack, since I didn't want to be super hungry when I made dinner in a bit.  D-E panda doesn't have any filling, but was had a sweet lemon-y taste.  I'm saving the others for tomorrow (maybe a snack later?).

Today is Squirrel Appreciation Day!

So appreciate some squirrels from my photo archive!
"I'm a squirrel!"
Girl squirrel!
"Om nom nom!"
"Wait, this shell was empty!"
"I have fuzzy red ears!"

Not my video: