Monday: "But I don't want to join the American Chemical Society. I'm not a chemical!"

To be fair though, the junk mail from ACS does have a convenient "tell us if you never want to hear from us ever again."  That's nice.

"What? I live in the suburbs like you. I work in the city. I take the train.  You got a problem with that?"

Wait...what?

• Ken Cuccinelli is probably disclosing this now since they might come out during the SEC investigation.   Nice job trying to cheat, douchebag.
• Why the sequester is a terrible idea, reason number 712.
• You suck, Lamar Smith.  Also: could you represent a more gerrymandered district?  "Southern Austin, northern San Antonio, plus a giant chunk of nothing to balance out the voters that live in those cities."  That clearly makes you an authority on science.
• "sitting outside my newborn son’s room all night with a gun so that no one will harm him, and practicing reloading my pistol one handed so I could defend my children while driving them to school." Dear crazy guy, we do not live in the world shown in such movies as "Mad Max." Those are made-up fake stories.
• "This is part of a balanced breakfast, as long as we're balancing breakfast on a three-tiered chocolate cake."