Wednesday: Let's talk about comics

So when I got to work today, I saw that Julie had sent me this tweet over IM.  My first thought was "what has DC fucked up this time?"  A quick search pointed me to this, and this (links from the same place because point two is more important, and they linked to their story on the first one).

First point: "Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice"?  Ok, that's a shitty title.  A large fraction of the internet pointed out that a team up of B&S already has a title: "World's Finest."  You already have a title for this, DC.  Why phrase it like that?  Oh, because you're going to have them fight, obviously.  And out of that fight, magically Justice will rise from the eastern sky, and everyone will go get some doughnuts?  I'm also pretty sure that you're going to fuck up including Wonder Woman in that movie too.  Do you know why?

Second point: it's being written by that asshole.  Or co-written, or whatever.  Let's start with the "maybe don't shit on your own companies products," aspect.  "Goyer asked, “How many people in the audience have heard of Martian Manhunter?” After hearing some light applause and cheers, he added, “How many people that raised their hands have ever been laid?”"  Dude, did you completely miss the Justice League cartoon that was on TV for five years?  MM was one of the main characters, so a pretty big chunk of the people who would be interested probably know who he is.

Next part: "So it’s like if I’m going to be this geek who becomes the Hulk then let’s create a giant green porn star that only the Hulk could fuck."  Skipping the "they're cousins, you dickbag" point that everyone else mentioned, it's clear that he hasn't read a She-Hulk comic.  Probably ever.  I linked to this sample before, and I'm doing it again.  The point of this volume of SH and what I remember of the previous one is that SH is perpetually trying her best to be a normal person and do normal-ish lawyer things, and that often requires smashing something the way only she can.  Plus, in this series, she's hanging out with Patsy Walker, Hellcat, and I simply can't go into how wonderfully insane that is.  Here's the important point if you skip that link, "She premiered as the star of a teen romantic-comedy series and was later integrated into Marvel superhero franchises such as the Avengers and the Defenders."

Here's the conclusion to this whole thing.  When I was a kid, I read Marvel comics pretty much exclusively.  No big clue why, but that's what I always got.  Then, once the Batman: TAS cartoon and the rest of the Bruce Timm led cartoons came on (and admittedly, like a decade or so of not buying comics passed), I started buying DC comics, because of those shows.  I even stuck with them through Infinite Crisis, Superboy reality changing punches and all.  However, they let shit writers like Grant Morrison take over things, and that was it.  They've squandered their best chances, and they seem determined to constantly do the wrong thing.

And because of that, I really hope this new movie fails.

• Cat.
• Andy Serkis is a jerk, and I hope his new movie fails too.
• I really hope this gets collected when it's done.  Pen Ward is not a jerk.