Tuesday: It's like Friday, but in the middle of the week.

Because tomorrow's a holiday.  Which of course means that the bank will be closed and I have two checks to deposit.  I wonder if the app allows magic camera depositing.

Horse.  No.  Just no, horse.  That's not your apartment, and everyone can see you with the lights on.  You're going to horse jail, horse.  Horse jail.

• Cilantro tastes like soap.
• That is a bad idea, dog.
• Ha ha! Fuck you, Eric Cantor!
• No seriously, the entire internet hates you.